The Trouble with Life Purpose


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I have become known for following my heart. I have not written for 7 months and here is why:

I finally understood the trouble with Life purpose all coaches talk about. It does not exist.

There is, however, something else that will make you shiver from excitement- the replacement for Life Purpose.

This is how it happened:

In January 2016, I moved back to London. Boom. A horrible change, I thought and within a few weeks I was back. Back to the old, boring life I was shrieking to leave before I moved to Andalucía, the land of passion, vibrancy and amazing food.

I was back in the cold grey, the stale staple diet of coaching and working on projects until an application deadline approached. My daughter’s secondary exam was due sooner than I could blink. And I dreaded it. Just because I home educate my children. I know I am good at education but I always avoided being known for that. It is something I have done on the side, dreaming up a big coaching business that will pay all our bills and holidays I love taking.

This time, something was different. One morning I understood that my daughter does not need a tutor or a coach. She needs my education philosophy that will help her through the awfulness of four exams. And me being picky and a notorious high achiever, I did not just apply for any school, no. I went for the jugular- for the top two schools in the country.

We studied, talked, explored and stretched her mind well beyond what I thought was even possible. I cried and suffered sleepless nights and worried about her heart, too. But as I was swimming in full boom education something has started to shift in me: I truly enjoyed every minute of what I was doing and when one night my best friend said to me- you are so brilliant at this that it blinds me, I was finally fine. More than fine, actually. I understood that education is the best use of me.

Let me explain why this is crucial- I have always been a champion for my clients to find their life purpose. The thing is, life purpose is not a concrete thing, an action or a thing to find. It is a fluid state of knowing where we are our best. In other words, it is the definition of the BEST USE OF YOU.

And since I have embraced that I will work on the best use of me, here is what has happened as a direct (or perhaps not so direct) result:

  • My daughter got an invitation for interview to the two top schools in the country and she was called a “remarkable young lady of special talents” (Me blushing a little….)
  • Spent a lot of 2016 feeling fulfilled and each night went to sleep deeply satisfied with what I am doing in my life
  • I have signed up for a trekking trip to the Hunza Valley in Pakistan to raise awareness and funds for educating children
  • I gave up my attachment to my coaching and been sought out for setting up HeartSmart learning groups and trainings for parents
  • …my hands shake as I write this, that is how excited I am!

 

And my business? Well, that shift  had a huge impact on that, too

  • I doubled my clients
  • I have been contracted to deliver 4 leadership trainings and coaching programmes both for volunteer organizations and corporate companies
  • Opened a new wing to my business, HeartSmart Education Consultancy, to help parents bring the best out of their children
  • Sold out my book, HeartSmart- One Woman’s Journey from her head to her Heart in 4 months
  • Set up a project plan to open a school (still working on it, will let you know how I get on)
  • Most importantly, I am truly excited about what is next

 

As I sit here and write, I am feeling light and easy-going. I am done with self-torturing and second guessing. Finally! Whilst it has been long time coming, I am still working out how I am going to follow the steps and what path this deep love for education will take me. I do not have a clue, to be honest. But I know I can trust my intuition more than anything in the world to keep me searching, questioning and move out of my own way any time I need to. There is no need to rush, push or overstretch. I have time to keep giving what the best use of me is and oh how I love that feeling!

So what is the bottom line, I ask as a coach often from my clients. This is my own answer to my own question:

  • Do not hide your natural talents. That is all you have to work on. Give the world what you are naturally good at
  • Do not hide your passion either. As a coach, this was one of my bedbug when they were training us- “find your passion”- they kept telling me (well, at that time all I could muster up was passion for food but I was only a freelance food critic for a while). Passion and Legacy are linked, you should never miss this truth. When you live your passion, you will inevitably leave a legacy.
  • Never get scared of changing directions in your life. When you open up, opportunities open up to you too.
  • Find the best use of you.

After all, life purpose is not the static truth we all must find. It is to see where that purpose is best used and for me it has always been education, no matter how much I tried to lie myself out of it. (yes, we all try to dream, it is part and parcel of being a coach). I know what the best use of me now and I am willing to go all the way to leave a note on this earth before I leave.

 

What is yours? 

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2 thoughts on “The Trouble with Life Purpose

  1. This is brilliant!
    As you know, I have been a floater; wavering and undecided on many things. Making the best of who you are now resonates with me so much. And it is opening doors or, to phrase it better, I am more willing to open doors and explore because I’m not fixated on a a path that I can see the end off.
    Btw, you are a fantastic coach and I’m sure you’ll be an amazing educator.

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